Boy did this one give us a rollicking good time in the office. I had to close the list for submissions so that we could get on with our day – the discussion got a bit out of hand…
What can be said about the following five items that could rival the memories they’ll surely spark in your hearts and minds? Nothing. That’s what. So I’ll just get on with it.
The Water Bed
Isn’t it gorgeous? Photo via eHow.com
As it turns out, I am the ONLY person in the office who didn’t have one in highschool. I’m not totally out of the club however, because I had a basement-dwelling boyfriend who did. My memory of the water bed: not appropriate. But I’m sure there was more than one ‘80s comedy that had a scene with a water bed being punctured, and a few horror films that had a petrified cast member gasping for breath just beneath it’s plastic surface… What was that from…anyone?
Central Vac System
Even more gorgeous than the water bed photo… Via Instructables.com
I’m sure some of you are going to protest this one, but I don’t know anyone who has even uttered the words in the past ten years. Actually, I’m lying; my girlfriend randomly asked me what I think of a central vac system because she was completing a reno, and briefly considered – at the contractor’s urge – supping up her walls with the central vac. Once she posed the question out loud, we both laughed. It just feels wrong. Why? Is it the unsightly and cumbersome mile of vac tubing? Doesn’t it tickle your funny bone a little? I mean, from what I remember – and I remember many of my friends having one – it really wasn’t much easier to use than a normal vac. Plus it scared me a little back then.
Photo via Coastal Enterprises.
Ah. This is a good one. As much as we will miss putting coloured woodchips and shrunken lemons in bowls on our toilet tanks, we can now draw an ambrosial breath of plug-in goodness. Right? I’ve a plug-in, don’t you? They still sell those sad, crunchy bags of nostril tickler, but when I see it in that discount bin at the craft store, I smirk at it.
Phone in the Bathroom
I couldn’t even find a good photo of a wall-mounted phone in a bathroom, it’s that gone…
Right now I’m humming “Mirror in the Bathroom” by the English Beat. But I digress. That same barnacle phone that was suctioned to the wall in your kitchen – the one in a mute salmon colour or perhaps that sickening cream, with the mile lone cord – that same phone made it’s way into the bathroom for a few decades there. And don’t even try to deny it. I’m sure you had one, or knew someone who had one, and they probably bragged about it like their bathroom was straight out of Scarface or something. (I didn’t have one because we spent those said decades in a gross apartment building, and that kind of luxury would have been wholly pretentious.)
The Thigh Master
Photo via ButThat’sNotAll blog
HA ha ha ha hahahahahahhahhhhhhhhhh! I had one. (Suzanne was hot thought, it’s true.)